Break

I'm taking a break from Facebook for the next little while. Probably at the least until we are back in the States. Just too much to do, too much stress & I need a break from all that business. 

I expect too much of myself sometimes, including when I should be able to snap out of a frame of mind in an emotional time. In complete honesty, I cannot see another pregnancy announcement at this point in time. I hate that when I see one or hear of one, I get angry; angry that I couldn't carry my babies, that come end of February, I won't be giving birth. I won't get to hold them, or kiss them or know them. I hate that I have a hard time being happy for others when it IS something to be happy about. I'm back at square one it feels like. Or maybe just going through another stage of grief. I'm not sure. I am sad, but more than that I'm angry. So, until I can work through that, I'll be on a hiatus from Facebook. I need to focus on me, and being the best mom that I can be to the two wonderful little miracles that I've been blessed with.

I will try to keep up the blog since I did promise certain family members that I would. But, things will get hairy in about a month as we ship our Jeep, pack up our house & move into the Army Lodge as we finish the last week or two here in Germany. 

As always, if you have my e-mail/imessage info, feel free to use it if you need to contact me :)

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Just some cute pictures from today. I am loving that Ellie's hair is getting to the point where I can attempt to fix it! So fun. And John is getting so big & independent. I can't believe he will be 2.5 in TWO days! I will definitely be doing a 2.5 year photoshoot & posting those, but as far as anything after that, I make no promises. So, stay tuned, I guess!

She finally is holding still enough to let me mess around with her hair. I  l o v e that she enjoys trying to do her hair too ;)

Don't mind John; he's busy dancing :)

I know I'm biased, but she is  beautiful!

John really loves his swim diapers.
FYI, they don't work well outside of the water :) I cleaned up a lot of pee earlier today lol.

ha I love that you can see John trying to put the swim diaper on in the background...
 & that Ellie swiped John's cup.

the light from the windows was just so pretty earlier.

Ellie's, "I'm not doing anything bad Mom, but I am thinking about it", face.

goofy boy! trying to stick the lens cap back on.

I just love kissing those chubby cheeks of his!

We had to order all new tires for the Jeep
{1. they were basically bald & 2. In order for the Jeep to be shipped back, they all needed to be new.}.
Anyway, so the tires came in & Nathan took them this morning to get installed.
The kids have had fun playing with their car seats today, they are so much fun inside the house.

{please excuse the grain in this photo... the lights were off so I only had the strand of christmas lights that we use as their night light! I had to crank my iso to 10,000!}
This is how I found John when I went to lay Ellie down for her afternoon nap LOL!
He's sporting one of Ellie's headbands too.
Oh this little boy of mine never stops giving me something to giggle about every day.
I love him so much for that!